Both men and women have ideas about how the feminine expression should be or is. In my own journey, I have never known what it is to be a woman - and in that space of not knowing, the natural flow is continually expressed. You may assume that a feminine expression would be all ‘lovey dovey’ and about having nice relaxing experiences of love and sweetness. However, you may soon be surprised at the loving, but uncompromising sword that chops your head off.
I have explored pointing to the nonduality of Life itself in many different ways. There is never the perfect way of saying it. There are never the perfect words or concepts that can ever fit the way it is. In fact the nature of words and concepts is to take something which is so unbelievably abstract and turn it into something tangible, something specific. The nature of words and concepts is to create separation and to be dual. However, in my experience I have found that nonduality can be pointed to beyond all the words and concepts. It is much more risky and sometimes frightening because it is often the first time for many people, to look at what is beyond all the words. We are so used to trusting only the words and analyzing what they mean in a very logical and rational way. But the words only dance on the surface. What is under the words is not known or understood.
The feminine expression of nonduality is beyond the words. It is in the Silence that is despite the words. This is what the feminine expression is really. It sings from the Silence. It does not care what the words say - they are almost irrelevant. They are only the individual notes in the piece of music. It is a complete resting. Such a resting. Such an anchor that nothing can budge it. The Silence is truly deafening. And then there is the invitation into that Silence…
Although the feminine expression of nonduality is not all ‘lovey dovey’, it is about Love, but Love is not always the sweetness and light that you may normally imagine. Love is the radical compassion that will not stand for any nonsense. It calls a spade a spade. It undermines every belief. It spares no prisoners. It does not dance on the surface, it dives to the root of it all. It is the Love that refuses to listen to the words and concepts, and doesn’t buy into any fear or emotion, but tirelessly points beyond them all. It is the Love that loves so much that it listens only to Love itself and meets everyone in that Love.
There is the assumption that nonduality is a prescription, whereas it is actually a description. The feminine expression of nonduality is like singing a song. It is a creative expression of the Love and Gratitude that underpins all the words. It is the expression of that beautiful yearning that most people feel. But the yearning has found a resting place in the Silence. It no longer yearns for something more than what is, but instead it expresses the Silence.
Although it may seem like it, I am not denying the intellect here at all. In fact it is included in this Love. Often in meetings someone will come up to have a dialogue and will have lots of intellectual questions or objections. Each one is met with a song that turns the question around to look for the questioner. In seeing for yourself that there is no questioner, the whole question drops away. The intellect is seen for what it really is.
In intimate dialogues we explore what is real right now. In meetings and retreats if you want to ask a question, you have to take the risk of exposing yourself by coming up to the front. There is often fear or embarrassment. But if you are not willing to risk exposing your vulnerability in front of other people, how will you be willing to risk losing everything you ever believed in? It is stepping into the fire willingly, knowing that it will burn up everything that you believe in. These meetings, and especially retreats, are not for the feint-hearted. If you want to wake up to the reality of the way it is beyond all the words and concepts, you will have to risk it all. The feminine expression of nonduality is not interested in playing around with the words and concepts of nonduality. It simply pulls the rug out from under your feet and leaves you with nothing but the freefall of Life as it is.
I embrace the word nonduality, as it is a word, a note in the song that sings beyond all the words. The feminine expression of nonduality rests in the Silence. It is this that melts the belief in separation, just as all the words try to do. This Silence is such a powerful force. It is the destroyer of illusion and anything that is not real and true. It is not soft and fluffy, and it is not dry and logical. It loves so much that it chops the heads off both.